Musings
an Online Journal of Sorts

By Alyce Wilson

The morning of my wedding with The Gryphon, I awoke refreshed. The Unisom had done its work.

I'd given myself enough time to have breakfast, take a shower and get everything together that had to go with me.

This was a relatively small amount of things, including my luggage and the cooler containing cucumber sandwiches and apples.

(I'm still waiting on the official photos of the wedding, including formals taken by our friend, The Photographer, and candids by my sister's wife. Therefore, the photos I share over the next couple of days are courtesy of my friends Attila the Pun, a college buddy; and BFF Pamela, a friend dating back to fifth grade. The photo above, however, was taken by The Photographer.)

My sister showed up, right on time, to drive me to the salon to have my hair done. We loaded up her car and I kissed The Gryphon good-bye. I wouldn't kiss him again until we were married! Since I knew the way, my sister suggested that I drive to the salon. I didn't mind, as concentrating on the road would keep my busy brain occupied.

While I was having my hair shampooed, my hair stylist helped my sister by straightening her hair and giving it a little oomph in the back, just the way she wanted. She did this free of charge, which I thought was stellar of her.

My sister, in bridesmaid finery

Somehow, the shampoo person got water down the back of my shirt, and when my stylist saw how wet my shirt was, she had me change into a smock and had someone throw the shirt in the dryer. It was bone dry by the time we left.

We chatted and enjoyed some complimentary coffee while my stylist did my hair. I'd brought a number of bejeweled hair pins with me, because we'd talked about the possibility of using them in front of my veil, which was a shorter than normal blusher veil, to complement the tea length gown. We opted not to use the pins, because we were going for a simple, elegant look.

My sister became overwhelmed by the smell of the hairspray, in part because several stylists were working at once. She had to leave the shop and wait outside until I was nearly done, when she came back inside looking miserable. I settled up at the cashier, and we headed out, with me driving again.

The Imp of the Perverse got to me, and I asked my sister if she had looked miserable because of the hairspray or because she hated my hair. She said as long as I liked it and I got what I want, everything was good. Not really a negative reply, but also not what I wanted to hear. I fumed silently for most of the drive.

Finally, my sister talked sense into me, reminding me that she and I had different tastes, that I, for example, wouldn't have done my hair the way she had for her wedding. Plus, she said she was there to be helpful and couldn't help me if I was going to be mad all day.

I apologized for my overly emotional response, and the tension eased. Besides, I knew the look I was going for, and I was confident the hair would complement it well.

When we got to the hotel, we stopped at the front desk. Of course, my veil was already firmly attached and would be for the rest of the day, so they immediately knew I was a bride. They joked, "Unless you're just wearing your hair like that." I assured them I was, indeed, a bride.

I needed to find out which rooms they were giving us to get ready in. They said they were giving us Suite 102, which is an office suite on the first floor. Also, our room for the evening, which I believe was the Presidential Suite, was available, as well.

So I made a quick decision that the women would get ready in Room 102 and the men could operate out of the Presidential Suite. I wouldn't discover until I saw our room much later how much nicer the Presidential Suite was, since Room 102 was just a business suite. Still, I think it was better for us to be downstairs, so that people like Mom could come through easily and ask me questions.

Plus, the men didn't need to stay in their room for long and then went downstairs to get things ready.

I'd barely received the room keys when my sister shooed me out of the lobby as The Gryphon entered. We were trying to honor The Gryphon's request to follow the tradition of not seeing me immediately before the wedding. When I was safely in 102, she called to find out what items had to be taken where. I told her my suitcases could go to the Presidential Suite, and the cooler and a few other items should come to Room 102.

Then I got in touch with Mom and let her know to have my dress and other clothing items brought down.

For a while, there was a little confusion as I fielded a number of calls. The banquet manager also stopped in to check in with me, and I introduced him to Mom and told her she was acting as my representative and should be able to answer any questions.

Before long, everything was operating smoothly. The florist's representatives arrived, and I introduced them to Mom, who helped them figure out where everything should go. Mom did exactly what I'd asked her to do and took care of all the last minute questions so I could focus on getting ready.

I really have to credit my ComedySportz classmate, Carol, for advising me to appoint a member of the family to take care of coordinating things on my wedding day. It saved me a lot of hassle.

We had arrived at about 1 p.m., and we had everything more or less sorted out by 2 p.m. My sister discovered we had a dry erase board in the office portion of our suite, and we wrote a quick guide to the different rooms where everything was taking place, as an easy reference.

I ate most of the lunch that The Gryphon had packed for me, but I was starting to have a nervous stomach and couldn't finish it. I put out the cucumber sandwiches and apples for the other bridesmaids, as well as the chocolate covered espresso beans. They dipped into the espresso beans and cucumber sandwiches (which were lovingly prepared and cut in quarters by The Gryphon), and they probably would have eaten the apples if I'd thought to have The Gryphon cut them into slices. Oh, well. You can't think of everything.

Over the next hour or so, the other bridesmaids showed up, and my sister and I busied ourselves with my makeup. I first had to put my contacts in, and while they weren't uncomfortable, my eyes were already beginning to get red. We also had a little trouble initially with the false eyelashes, which we were using to achieve the '60s look of a strong lash line. I looked at myself in the mirror, with my reddening eyes and askew lash line, and thought I looked more like the Bride of Frankenstein than an elegant '60s bride.

But my sister good-naturedly redid the eyelashes until we got them right, which was an impressive feat, as her hands were starting to tremble from nervousness. She asked my brother's wife, who was there to take candids, to apply my eyeliner, and she did it perfectly. We have the same shape eye, so she knew exactly how to apply it on me.

At one point, The Cousin, our guest book attendant, came in and asked if she could bring her daughters to say hello. I told her of course she could. When she saw my hair, she said that I definitely looked different than she was used to, and I wasn't sure at first how to take that. She has since told me that I looked beautiful and that when she said it was "different", she just meant different from "my normal prettiness." She called me "very glamorous" and said my hair looked gorgeous.

The Cousin, in fact, was one of the people who was in the room when they actually helped me put the dress on, and everyone oohed and aahed about how well everything fit together.

When I thought about it afterwards, I second-guessed whether I should have gone for something more extravagant, something more traditionally romantic, with my hair. Then I remembered what my purpose had been, which was to use all my accessories, including my makeup and hair, to complement the dress, not compete with it. I felt this was important because the dress, though tea length, included a lot of details on the fitted bodice. Anything too glitzy or showy would make me look more like a Vegas showgirl.

I was going for red carpet glamour, and as I put on my dangling earrings, fastened my silver choker and donned my ivory fingerless gloves, everyone in the room agreed that the look was, indeed, glamorous. If you can't be glamorous on your wedding day, when can you?

As the time drew near for the ceremony, Mom came in to show me a photo she'd taken of the front of the ceremony room. They'd had to hang the curtains from a frame instead of suspend them from the ceiling. Since I'd only wanted them to form a central focus for the front of the room, much like an arch would do, I thought it was perfect and told her so.

She stopped in a bit later, wearing her dress, and told me everything was ready. My sister helped her with a little makeup, but she refused lip color, saying she didn't want to leave anything on my face if she kissed me. We assured her that my lip gloss should be fine, but she declined the offer, and we didn't press the point.

If I forgot to tell her then, I want to say that, to me, she's always beautiful, with lipstick or without.

A couple minutes before the ceremony, Mom stopped in to tell me they were waiting for the DJ to change into a tuxedo shirt and a nice pair of pants. He'd had to wait until the last minute, because before then he'd been carrying equipment around and setting things up.

Before very long, we got the call to come to the ceremony room. We stood in the back and waiting for the right point in the music to begin processing. The song was a variation of Pachelbel's Canon in D called "Meditation 1" by Continuo from the album Meditations on Pachelbel's Canon. It starts out with a very lush, Eastern sound and then kicks into a march-worthy version of the Canon.

Though we had to wait to start, the music got everybody's attention, alerting them to watch for us to begin. As we awaited our turn, Mom on my left arm and Dad on my left, Mom was gripping my arm so hard I had to tell her to ease up, for fear she'd leave bruises (I bruise really easily; part peach, I believe)!

Mom and Dad shortly after the ceremony

As we headed down the aisle, I saw The Gryphon waiting for me. Just like so many people had told me, as soon as I saw him, I was all smiles and remained so for the rest of the day. My parents escorted me up the aisle, and I gave them each hugs before they sat down.

Then Mom read a poem that she'd written about me when I was first leaving home, after graduating high school. She got emotional during it, and I patted her shoulder while she read, then gave her a big hug.

The Pastor delivered a really thoughtful meditation, advising us that sometimes marriage wasn't easy and that we'd have to work on it, but that the best love grows from those challenges. She also counseled that it was important we both retain our individuality, which I thought was really insightful. Really, it was some of the best writing I've ever heard from her, and I was genuinely moved.

She gave me the cue to give my bouquet to my sister, and we stepped forward and took hands to exchange our vows.

(From l) My College Roommate, my sister, me, The Gryphon,
The Cheshire Cat and The Dormouse

The Pastor had thought ahead and included them in her binder, so we could just turn our heads and read, rather than digging out a scrap of paper. I got unexpectedly choked up while reading my vows, because I looked at The Gryphon. He had such a look of love in his face that I was truly overwhelmed.

Honestly, our love has been a revelation. For anyone who doesn't believe that love can be supportive, that love can buoy you up, make you sing inside, and make you a greater person, hear it from me. Believe.

The Gryphon delivered his vows, with the sort of earnestness that first drew me to him. You can always read his emotion in his face, and what I saw at that moment was clearly love and devotion.

We drew together and kissed, and then The Pastor was announcing us as Mr. and Mrs.! We recessed down the aisle to "Canon in D" (DJ LM Remix by DJ LM, which is available as a free download from CTQMusic.com. It's another version of the canon, with a lot of celebratory kick. I'd joked that it was our runway music, because it was the sort of music you strut to. While we were walking down the aisle and everyone was waving the festive bell wands, festooned with silver and teal streamers, I couldn't have been happier.

BFF Pamela's daughter with streamers

I heard later that our guests nicknamed the wands "cat toys" and enjoyed playing with them. All throughout the night, people waved them cheerily.

We lined up for our receiving line, and I got a lot of compliments about how beautiful I looked and how beautiful the ceremony was.

The Cheshire Cat, me and The Gryphon in the receiving line

I've written quite a bit so far, so I'll pause here and pick up with the reception tomorrow.

More on Alyce's wedding planning:

Musings on Alyce's Wedding

Copyright 2006 by Alyce Wilson

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