The auditions kicked off with Mark
Labriola, 28, Aurora, Colorado, who says he's often told he looks
like Jack Black (I don't see it). He wore horn-rimmed aviator glasses,
a black newsboy hat, a black button-down shirt, and a white tie. The
judges spent some time talking to him about his childhood, when his
mom kidnapped him from his dad for six years, after which his dad regained
custody. Today, he's the father of a son. He performed "Tempted"
by Squeeze, and his voice was better than I expected: smooth with lots
of energy. Victoria said that, based on how he was dressed, she'd "thought
you were going to do something jokey" and that his vocals were
a "really nice surprise." Simon Cowell liked that he's "honest
about your background." He got four yeses.
Not quite so lucky, but clearly nervous, was Mario Galvan, 25, Denver,
a nicotine addictions counselor. He wore a black T-shirt with a green
Army trench coat but was plagued with a nervous laugh, which Simon mocked.
He did the Elvis Presley song "Jailhouse Rock," which was
mediocre at best, although there were a few moments where he tried to
capture the Elvis vibe. Surprisingly, he said that he had once won the
role of Jekyll and Hyde for a "Broadway review." I suspect
this was a local theater production of Broadway songs. It was a no.
[VIDEO]
This was followed by a montage of rejected people swearing.
Next to try her luck was Kimberly
Kerbow, 24, Marina Del Ray, California, a single mom with a 5-year-old
daughter. She wore a strapless, multicolored sun dress, but her most
distinguishing figure was glossy, reddish-brown hair that looked like
a wig. She turned in a cheesy rendition of "The Way I Am,"
adding some lyrics, apparently aimed at Simon, about how she'd buy him
Rogaine when he needed it. She had a decent voice, but I found her personality
grating. Simon said, "You're very lippy but you're very funny,
and I'm going to say yes." She got four yeses, and after she left
the room, Simon pointed out that he thought she'd been wearing a wig.
Her success was followed by a montage of golden tickets.
Danelle Hays, 24, of Seattle hosts live karaoke, sings in a cover band,
and does song-writing on the side. She wore layered gray and black tank
tops with big silver hoop earrings, and layers of silver coin necklaces.
Oddly, she also had a bandana over her hair. I thought she looked a
little bit like Ani DiFranco. In her interview portion, she nearly broke
into tears talking about how hard she'd been working, trying to find
success, including singing for corporate functions. She sang "I'm
the Only One," capturing Melissa Etheridge's smoky, impassioned
delivery. Simon said, "I like you, but I think that you're almost
broken. You may have come in here just in time to rescue you from corporate
hell." Kara DioGuardi said, "This was the most moving audition.
And what people look for... is to be moved." Victoria told her
"you're gorgeous" and that she should "take your little
boy out and celebrate." She got four yeses. [VIDEO]
Next, we were treated to a montage of people wearing strange outfits,
including cowboy boots, colored wigs, and even wings.
The female judges engaged in sexual harassment for the next hopeful,
Casey James,
27, Fort Worth, Texas. He'd been in a motorcycle accident at 21 and
suffered multiple compound fractures in his femur, arm and wrist. Despite
daily pain, he'd learned to play guitar again. Of course, the ladies
didn't care about any of this: they only seemed to care about his natural
good looks. He'd arrived with his dark blond hair in ponytail, wearing
a button-down denim shirt, but after an OK audition, where Simon noted
his lack of charisma, Kara told him to take his hair down. Victoria
asserted that he looks like a model. Kara advised him to work on his
personality and then demanded that he take his shirt off! After he did,
she said yes, with Victoria joining her. Simon said no, but Randy Jackson
gave him a yes "for the girls," although advising him he's
"got to find some persona pills, something." With three yeses,
he was through to the Hollywood round.
High-school student Tori
Kelly, of Canyon Lake, California, looked a lot older than her 16
years. Perhaps it's the effects of her dark tan. She brought along a
family friend, a little girl named Hope, who presented drawings to the
judges. She sang "Gravity" by John Mayer and had kind of a
soulful voice with a little twang to it, although she ran out of steam
at the end. Kara said she really liked her, while Simon said, "Out
of the two, I'd prefer Hope." He added, "Your voice was almost
annoying." Victoria, however, praised her look, saying that she
looked classy; and "women are going to love you." Simon, commenting
on Tori's bright orange sundress and her tan, said, "You're like
a human orange." She got a yes from everyone but Simon, who remarked,
"I think these three are mad." It was, however, enough to
send her to Hollywood.
That marked the end of day one, so we saw a montage of people receiving
golden tickets.
College football player Austin
Paul, 22, Washington, D.C., is studying music composition and was
full of confidence. He looked a little like Luke Wilson, with a long
nose and dark blonde hair. Wearing a bedazzled dark blue shirt with
jeans and pale blue sneakers, his audition revealed just an ordinary
voice with too much vibrato on the high notes. It was his personality,
however, that the judges despised. Kara said, he'd "come off a
bit cocky." Simon noted his voice "could be very annoying,"
and Victoria felt he was "a little bit arrogant." He got four
nos.
Kenny Everett, 24, Durham, North Carolina, could have rivaled Austin
for confidence. He told the camera he was the world's best singer and
that he was "the male Mary J. Blige." He regularly sings in
a park, where he views his singing as a public service "because
it brings people together," presumably as they clasp hands and
run away. He wore a western red-and-black plaid shirt, which for some
reason, he pulled off while singing to to reveal a bright orange ringer
T-shirt, paired with oversized jeans with bleach patterns that looked
straight out of 1990. After starting out singing, he started to improvise
into an invisible mike, just wailing. Simon said it "sounded like
you had been punched" and added, "It wasn't singing. It was
literally screaming at us." Kenny got four nos, to which he replied,
"You've got to be kidding me. I'm a great singer." Simon replied,
"No you're not, and you're never going to be." Kenny, however,
continued singing until they finally convinced him to leave. [VIDEO]
His exit was followed by a montage of other nos.
Determined Nicci
Nix, 22, Florence, Italy, had flown for 14 hours to make the audition.
She had a high, squeaky voice like Victoria Jackson, which I found distracting.
She auditioned in a modern white mini dress, which looked nice contrasted
with her long, dark hair. Simon, making fun of her speaking voice, asked
her if she'd "drunk any helium." Victoria, however, remarked,
"I like your dress." Nicci sang "Something Kind of Ooh"
by Girls Aloud, a very odd song to audition with, because the lyrics
are mainly composed of "oohs". She had an OK voice and was
somewhat commercial sounding. Simon noted, "You sing so much deeper
than you talk. It's weird. ... You're a funny little thing, aren't you?"
Victoria liked her look and said she "has beautiful skin."
She got four yeses.
Haeley Vaughn
has been fighting since she was a premature baby, born at only 2 pounds.
She's also since lost her father. Her goal is to be "first black
pop country mainstream singer." She sang the Carrie Underwood song
"Last Name," wearing a white ruffled no-sleeved shirt with
a black miniskirt and black stiletto high-heeled sandals, along with
silver chandelier earrings. Simon called her a "cute little thing"
but noted a "slight lisp when you sing." Still, he liked that
she's different, and he called her "infectious." Victoria
called her bubbly, and Kara said she'd stand out, because there are
not many black pop country singers. Randy cautioned her to watch that
she doesn't become too sound-alike with artists like Carrie Underwood.
Kara advised her to lower her register a little. Haeley got permission
to bring her sister and mom into the room, so they were there as the
judges gave her four yeses.
The final audition of day two was Ty Hemmerling, who hoped to capture
attention the same way that Katrina Darrell captured attention last
year, showing up for auditions in a bikini and earning the nickname
Bikini Girl. Ty showed up wearing the same suit as Katrina had worn
and delivered an anemic performance of the Billy Ray Cyrus song "Achey
Breaky Heart." After Kara warned him, "Don't move your hips
like that," telling him it's not a good look, the judges left the
room, as he just stood here. "Are they really leaving?" he
asked. Yes, they are. And you can read that as a no.
All told, 26 golden tickets were distributed in the Mile-High City.
Tonight is the last stop of the audition tour, with host Ryan Seacrest
promising that they're "saving the best for last."
More Musings
on American Idol Season 9