Musings
an Online Journal of Sorts

By Alyce Wilson

About a week ago, the Penn State English Department e-mailed me.

I received my MFA in poetry 10 years ago, and they wanted an update on what I've done. Seems they want to add to their bragging list.

Nothing puts things in perspective quite like having someone request a list of your accomplishments over the past 10 years.

In terms of my career, I've had some successes, though not as many as I'd like. I've been published in a number of literary magazines, and lately my rate of acceptance is much better than in the past.

I've self-published a book of poetry, Picturebook of the Martyrs, currently available only as a print-on-demand book, since the ebook publisher went under.

For several years, I worked as a newspaper reporter in a small town and wrote a series of articles on alternative medicine, as well as a couple feature articles, that were picked up for national distribution by the Associated Press.

My biggest career accomplishment to date would be founding Wild Violet in 2001, an online quarterly literary magazine publishing poetry, fiction, essays, humor, reviews, interviews and artwork. Over the years, we've published some great interviews with people in the arts, and we regular receive submissions from people with impressive writing credits.

In addition, I have a number of long-range book projects that are currently on hold while I plan my September wedding. So it's not as if I haven't achieved anything.

Some of my most important achievements in the past decade, though, wouldn't fit on a CV. For example, I've made great strides towards physical and emotional health, which is something I doubt would interest the English Department.

Shortly after grad school, I married The Druid, a hippie dreamer who began to suffer increasing problems with schizophrenia, refusing to seek treatment. We were divorced a year and a half later, which left me feeling distraught and guilty.

At that point, I hit my emotional nadir, and in addition to the 50 pounds I'd gained since my freshman year of college, I gained 30 more, as I tried to bury my depression in food and alcohol. A couple years later, at the bottom on the emotional well, I got involved with The Luser, a manipulative lowlife who never would have interested me if I hadn't already been so emotionally dissipated.

But with the millennium came hope. I kicked The Luser to the curb, and with the love and support of my sister, made a vow to change my life. I started by watching portion sizes and increasing exercise, eventually learning more about nutrition to make more educated decisions. For the past three years, I've been doing Weight Watchers online, with great results. I'm down from a size 20 to a size 8.

For the first couple years of the millennium, I only worked on my physical health. But with the encouragement of my then-boyfriend, The Invisible Man, I entered counseling to deal with the emotional issues that had been tormenting me. I learned a lot about myself, dealt with old issues of self-esteem, and learned about my internal strengths.

The counseling had done its trick, so that when The Invisible Man and I broke up, I recognized it as a change for the better. We have remained friends.

I suppose those of you who are reading Musings know what happy development occurred in my life next. At Otakon 2003, The Gryphon and I, who had known each other for several years, hit it off romantically. We'll celebrate our fourth anniversary this weekend, and our wedding is next month.

So for me, the personal accomplishment of improving both my physical and emotional health, combined with finding a positive, supportive relationship, may just be my best accomplishments in the past 10 years. Even if they don't fit on a CV.

Copyright 2006 by Alyce Wilson

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