Musings
an Online Journal of Sorts
By Alyce Wilson
April 18, 2008 - Found Signs
On this sunny Friday, I'll share some amusing signs, all photographed with my cell phone.
First, a sign posted on the side of an office building in Center City. There's a small red sign reading, "FIRE TOWER 11" and underneath it, a white sign with a seemingly random exhortation: "PLEASE DO NOT PUT FEET ON WALL."
Why was this sign deemed necessary? I'm guessing the spot is frequented by smokers and that, while having a cig, someone was in the habit of leaning against the wall, one foot up, thus leaving footprints on the dark-painted building. Either that, or the previous sign read "KICK ME."
The next one hangs in a bathroom stall at the local YMCA, near the daycare. The sign reads: "STAFF AND CHILDREN MUST WASH THEIR HANDS AFTER TOILETING AND BEFORE EATING". Somebody added, in pencil, "SOAP AND HOT WATER" and, after "STAFF AND CHILDREN," added "ADULTS, EVERYBODY." Then, at the top in green marker, the same person emphasized: "(EVERYBODY!)"
Why has no one has corrected "TOILETING" to "USING THE TOILET"? Because I never remember to bring a pen.
The next sign hangs in the bathroom of a Center City Philadelphia business and contains the sort of grammatical mistake that makes literary elitists like myself snicker. It reads: "Please do not put paper towels, feminine products, or other items in the toilet. Please throw it in the trash bin. Thank You, Amazon Cafe".
In unison, English geeks: "I tried to throw the toilet away, but it was bolted to the floor."
And finally, a sign outside a business that sells tombstones. They often put incongruous messages on their sign, which I rarely manage to photograph (since I'm normally driving). But this one was worth pulling over. I call it: "Death and Taxes."
I often wonder if the proprietor of this business has a wicked sense of humor or is just completely clueless. Either way, you've got to love a tombstone business that makes you smile.
Moral:
It doesn't take much to amuse me.
Copyright
2008 by Alyce Wilson
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